Al Adamson Double Feature
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I love a good bad horror movie. Those movies that make you laugh due to how horrible they are, are always invited into my DVD player. Throw in some breasts and gore and you could have a cult classic on your hands. Now, I’ve said it many times already: there is a fine line between shit and enjoyable shit. Some movies are so bad that I just get furious at having to watch them. With that in mind, let’s get into today’s review of Shock-O-Rama’s release of two Al Adamson “classics”.

First up is a western starring John Carradine and Scott Brady; Five Bloody Graves. It opens with Death giving us a little back-story and narrating about how two of his helpers or something are going to fill five graves. Gotcha. The narration is not that bad (if not nonsensical), but unfortunately the movie is quite bad and worst yet; bland. The movie has all the look of a 70s exploitation flick full of grain and pops, minus the fun exploitation. When people die in the movie they hold their gut, grimace and slowly fall over. How do you know if someone gets shot with an arrow? They look like they just shat themselves and they will have a little quill sticking out of their back. Another disappointing thing is that the buxom beauties keep their cloths on. Don’t tease me with a tag line that says “Lust-Mad Men and Lawless Women in a Vicious and Sensuous Orgy of Slaughter!” and not give me any orgy. Hell, there is more sex in a 90 year old Roman Catholic grandmother’s home than in this movie.

I’m getting ahead of myself. The movie is about a man and some Indians. That’s about it. There is something about Five Bloody Graves, yet there is never anything that comes about that. The editing is all over the place and the music never fits the action (or wanna be action). Honestly folks, this is one lame ass Western. Pass this one.

After this “winner” is over we get to watch trailers. Now, these are winners. Notice I used no quotations. That means I’m serious. These trailers were great. Watch the trailer for Cinderella 2000 and tell me it doesn’t make you smile.

After the trailers we move to The Possession of Nurse Sherri. While also a bad movie, this one has more spice to make it a semi-enjoyable bad movie. The movie opens with some horrible acting (natch) between a cult leader and one of his followers. While bringing a dead parishioner back to life he has a heart attack. He gets taken to the best hospital around. These nurses are all sluts. One patient is nervous about getting some surgery so a nurse whips off her cloths and hops right on. Man, if only I had nurses like that when I got my tonsils taken out. Sure would be better than a bowl of freakin ice cream. Anyways, while the crazy cult guy gets operated on his spirit goes into the air. One night after making some 70s sex with her doctor boyfriend (everyone sleeps with everyone at this hospital. I love it!) a ridiculous animated ghost leaps into her. The possession is a true sight to behold Bums. Take your pick on good or bad. Every now and then Sherri will black out and go and kill someone. I never really understood why she was killing who she was killing, but who cares really. The plot was shit, but we do get some o’ natural breasts. It all leads up to her two whore friends to rid Sherri of the possession.

In all reality this collection is not an absolute bust I wouldn’t recommend a purchase. Frankly, I don’t think anyone was asking for an Al Adamson collection, but here you go anyways.

On an interesting side note, read up a little about the demise of Al Adamson. Quite interesting stuff.

Anyhow, back to if you should buy this. I cannot recommend a buy of this collection at all. I will say if you find it very cheap (and you know what you are getting) then maybe take a peek. Disregard 5 Bloody Graves altogether, so that leaves you a semi entertainingly horrible Nurse Sherri and some interesting trailers. Again, you have gotta love Cinderella 2000. Sweet Jesus.

Added:  Sunday, August 05, 2007

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